mcdolands:

Me: “dad am i adopted?”
Dad:no, ur David. why woud anyone name you ‘Adopted’? even if we wanted to, ur name was alredy David when we adopted you

Reblog2 weeks ago with 89,647 notes

telapathetic:

the only disadvantage to cereal is you cant hear anything while watching tv

Reblog3 weeks ago with 255,860 notes

bullied:

maybe ur dick is so small because you shoved 2/3 of it into your personality

Reblog1 month ago with 121,289 notes